Spiderman, Spiderman

So last time I visited my family, I turned on the tube on Saturday night and found all sorts of good things - 2001, The Wild Bunch, etc. This time ..... not so much. So my dad and I sat down and watched Spiderman on TNT. A few thoughts.

1) At the climax, The Green Goblin is forcing Spidey to make a choice between saving Mary Jane or a trolley car filled with a boy scout troop. I'm sorry, but is this any sort of dilemma? The hot girl you are in love with or a trolley car of annoying children that you don't know and who are just going to go play video games later and forget about you? Easy choice, in my book.

2) You know those kids in movies who look up at the side of a falling building headed their way but freeze up and don't run so that the hero has to swing down and save them? I've decided it's best if we just let them go. They're obviously not going to be missed in the gene pool.

3) I know, we aren't supposed to care when a character can't figure out that the voices of the superhero and the alter ego sound exactly alike. But could they at least not make it so that Mary Jane hears Spidey and Peter's voices twenty seconds apart in the same scene and still doesn't have a clue?

4) In what world would a girl look at a rich James Franco and a relatively poor Tobey Maguire and choose Tobey Maguire?

5) Mary Jane goes from loving Franco to Spiderman to Peter Parker in the course of two hours. Slut.